# So there's this cute girl that I really like...



## Zombocalypse (Jun 11, 2017)

So there's this cute girl that I really like...



She works at an oriental food store. Chinese, about 5'1, petite, VERY pretty. There are a lot more women I've seen who have a sexier, sluttier presence than her, but I'm the kind of guy who appreciates "cuteness" more than sex appeal.

Anyway, I'm thinking of asking her out.

If you were in my shoes, how would you do it?

I got a plan in place for this thing, but I'm interested to know how YOU guys would do it.

Let's discuss.


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## Bro Bundy (Jun 11, 2017)

that sweet n sour pussy..I fukked a few asians in my time..I had to pay for it but its the same thing i suppose


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## Zombocalypse (Jun 11, 2017)

Bro Bundy said:


> that sweat n sour pussy..I fukked a few asians .in my time..I had to pay for it but its the same thing i suppose



To be honest, Asian girls aren't really my type. I prefer white women, at least in the looks department.

But there are exceptions. The girl I'm talking about here IS an exception. Really cute.

Anyway, she doesn't seem to be slutty. I'm not sure if I should hope to be wrong or right. lol


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## ECKSRATED (Jun 11, 2017)

Say " I need some sauce to dip my egg roll in" then give a longggg wink. Bamm in the pussy


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## Zombocalypse (Jun 11, 2017)

ECKSRATED said:


> Say " I need some sauce to dip my egg roll in" then give a longggg wink. Bamm in the pussy



Honestly, I actually think she'd appreciate that. She'd be bored with the monotony of her job.

But no, I wouldn't say that. lol


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## silvereyes87 (Jun 11, 2017)

You should look up a past members idea on how to
Approach women. His name was fruity.


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## knightmare999 (Jun 11, 2017)

Do they sell condoms there?  If so, get some, and while she's checking you out say, "So, what time am I picking you up?" 
If she asks, "Are those for me?"
Tell her, "No, these are for a piece I'm knocking the bottom out of in a little bit.  I'm raw dogging your fine a$$"
You might get slapped 9 out of every 10 times, but every inch you add to your arms will get you 8 out of 10, 7 out of 10, etc.


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## stonetag (Jun 11, 2017)

Can't help you, for me, slutty rules.


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## Zombocalypse (Jun 11, 2017)

stonetag said:


> Can't help you, for me, slutty rules.



I understand what you're saying. But banging slutty girls isn't really that much of an accomplishment. I've banged girls that I've picked up from bars before. There's nothing satisfying about it. I might have well just masturbated.

On the other hand, there are those quality girls who'd only give you a kiss instead of a blowjob. Yet that simple kiss feels a lot better than ****ing some dumb bimbo's pussy. lol

To each his own, I guess.


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## PillarofBalance (Jun 11, 2017)

ECKSRATED said:


> Say " I need some sauce to dip my egg roll in" then give a longggg wink. Bamm in the pussy



This but take it a step further. Whip out the dick and slap it on the counter.


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## BigGameHunter (Jun 11, 2017)

I once got fired for weighing my scrotum on the deli scales at a quick stop I worked at as a whipper. If you do it right (tip toe up to scale and ease down slightly)  the weight will be off the charts and your nuts will spread out like StoneTag at a mountain oister festival. After that it won't matter if she sees your pecker. Your in.

Dont tell me those cheap Asian markets don't have a digital scale somewhere.


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## Solomc (Jun 12, 2017)

Bro Bundy said:


> <p>
> that sweet n sour pussy..I fukked a few asians in my time..I had to pay for it but its the same thing i suppose</p>



Lmfao.   Dude that's fukking hilarious


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## Solomc (Jun 12, 2017)

This guys seems to have it figured out
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=ta0Iiphf9L8


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## PillarofBalance (Jun 12, 2017)

Did you PIITB yet? Can you post nudez of her please?


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## Beezy (Jun 12, 2017)

PillarofBalance said:


> Did you PIITB yet? Can you post nudez of her please?



Haha! Such a warm, nurturing group.


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## Solomc (Jun 12, 2017)

PillarofBalance said:


> Did you PIITB yet? Can you post nudez of her please?



Ya know for a moment there I thought you were gibsonator.  Lol


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## bvs (Jun 12, 2017)

Just be a man and ask her out. And if she says no take it like a man, say thank you and move on. If you never ask you will never know


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## Gibsonator (Jun 12, 2017)

PillarofBalance said:


> Did you PIITB yet? Can you post nudez of her please?



I had to think about that for about .3 seconds... put it in the butt, is it bad I figured that out so quickly?


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## saltylifter (Jun 12, 2017)

Get what you can then run.. women are trouble man


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## Summer (Jun 12, 2017)

I'm a girl, I'm sure she would just appreciate you honestly asking her out for a meal or something. We generally don't like pickup lines.. and don't try and act smooth or like you got lots of game, she will think your a ****boy and we generally try to avoid them.


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## Jin (Jun 12, 2017)

If she's really Chinese and not westernized you should show her that you have a stable job and good income potential :32 (17):

You live in the US or abroad?


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## Mythos (Jun 12, 2017)

Zombocalypse said:


> I got a plan in place for this thing, but I'm interested to know how YOU guys would do it.
> 
> Let's discuss.



'Plans' are for kidnappings..be spontaneous.


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## Jin (Jun 12, 2017)

Mythos said:


> 'Plans' are for kidnappings..be spontaneous.



Maybe that is the plan.


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## NbleSavage (Jun 12, 2017)

"Excuse me Miss...does this rag smell like chloroform to you?"


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## John Ziegler (Jun 12, 2017)




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## stonetag (Jun 12, 2017)

NbleSavage said:


> "Excuse me Miss...does this rag smell like chloroform to you?"



I don't care who you are, that shit works EVERY time!


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## silvereyes87 (Jun 12, 2017)

Summer said:


> I'm a girl, I'm sure she would just appreciate you honestly asking her out for a meal or something. We generally don't like pickup lines.. and don't try and act smooth or like you got lots of game, she will think your a ****boy and we generally try to avoid them.



Girls fall for fuk boy antics left and right lol. 
Zombie,  if u want this chick don't be a nice guy. Lol


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## widehips71 (Jun 12, 2017)

Summer said:


> I'm a girl, I'm sure she would just appreciate you honestly asking her out for a meal or something. We generally don't like pickup lines.. and don't try and act smooth or like you got lots of game, she will think your a ****boy and we generally try to avoid them.



Boooorrrriiiinnnnnggggggggggg


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## widehips71 (Jun 12, 2017)

Dumb shit that has worked.



Hand her the phone.  Me - Hey put your number in my phone.

Leaving the gym at the same time...  Me - What are you doing later?  Wanna go out to the beaches tonight?  Her - Sure. How will we get home though?  Me - We won't.  There's some nice hotels we can get.  Her - But won't we be bad?  Me - Yes

Her - Heeyyyy and winks. Me - Sup. You're not hanging out with these losers are you?  Her - Yeah kinda haha.  Me - **** that. Come with us.  Her - Ok

Or knightmares personal favorite.  Walk up to her - Hey you wanna get outta here?  Her - Sure



Point is, if a chick wants you you dont have to be clever, smart, or funny.  You just have to let it be known you want to see her naked, and she'll get naked.


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## knightmare999 (Jun 12, 2017)

widehips71 said:


> Dumb shit that has worked.
> 
> Or knightmares personal favorite.  Walk up to her - Hey you wanna get outta here?  Her - Sure



What made that was the look on the guy's face that she was with!

Hahaha


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## Beezy (Jun 12, 2017)

Zeigler said:


>



Was I the only one who scratched my head when he said, "Go back to your country"?


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## Seeker (Jun 12, 2017)

Dude just go up to her and ask her out. Don't be a wimp. Ask her out and show some confidence when you do. Not arrogance, confidence.


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## BRICKS (Jun 12, 2017)

What Seeker said ^^^^


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## NbleSavage (Jun 12, 2017)

Seeker said:


> Dude just go up to her and ask her out. Don't be a wimp. Ask her out and show some confidence when you do. Not arrogance, confidence.



A Mate of mine was a wee lad - literally, back when we fought he owned the welterweight class. Thing is, someone forgot to tell him he was only 68 kilos - when we went out on the town he strutted with the swagger of a Silverback. Went right up to the ladies, never profane but always direct if he had an interest. 

And he got more #ss than a toilet seat.


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## DieYoungStrong (Jun 12, 2017)

Get an egg roll and stick your dick in it. Hold her nose and pour some sweet and sour sauce down her throat. She'll have no choice but to suck your egg roll dick to chase the sweet and sour down.


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## silvereyes87 (Jun 12, 2017)

^^^^ what dys said


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## PillarofBalance (Jun 12, 2017)

Did you **** her yet you pussy?


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## Dungeon Dweller (Jun 12, 2017)

My old standby is "DTF?". 60% of the time it works every time.


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## Maijah (Jun 12, 2017)

PillarofBalance said:


> This but take it a step further. Whip out the dick and slap it on the counter.



We call this the "Indiana Jones" when in doubt, whip it out, Indiana Jones


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## CardinalJacked (Jun 12, 2017)

Are their coochies blurred out in real life like they are in their porn?


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## ICanBench50 (Jun 12, 2017)

I'm a virgin.


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## Maintenance Man (Jun 12, 2017)

OP said he had a plan...well what is it?? You got plenty of our takes on the matter. What is yours?


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## BigSwolePump (Jun 12, 2017)

I haven't seen a response yet. Maybe her dad was a ninja and assassinated him for dishonoring his daughter...


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## TrickWilliams (Jun 12, 2017)

BigSwolePump said:


> I haven't seen a response yet. Maybe her dad was a ninja and assassinated him for dishonoring his daughter...



Maybe he manned up. Asked her out yesterday evening and they have been in Bonerville ever since. 

Hasn't had time to check his thread.


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## BigSwolePump (Jun 12, 2017)

TrickWilliams said:


> Maybe he manned up. Asked her out yesterday evening and they have been in Bonerville ever since.
> 
> Hasn't had time to check his thread.


 LMAO! That is probably more likely than the ninja story.


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## knightmare999 (Jun 12, 2017)

BigSwolePump said:


> LMAO! That is probably more likely than the ninja story.



No, I'm going with the ninja story.  He didn't bow before penetrating the anus like Jin warned about.


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## Zombocalypse (Jun 13, 2017)

Jin said:


> If she's really Chinese and not westernized you should show her that you have a stable job and good income potential :32 (17):
> 
> You live in the US or abroad?



I live in the USA.


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## Zombocalypse (Jun 13, 2017)

CardinalJacked said:


> Are their coochies blurred out in real life like they are in their porn?



I literally laughed out loud with this.


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## Zombocalypse (Jun 13, 2017)

Maintenance Man said:


> OP said he had a plan...well what is it?? You got plenty of our takes on the matter. What is yours?



When I like a girl, I'm usually direct and quick to flirt.

But I plan on taking this slowly.

I'll keep you all updated. This Saturday, I'll go visit the store and strike up small talk with her. My first step with this whole thing is to make myself familiar to her first. The goal is for her to see me as a stable, normal, funny guy...

Also, I plan on telling her I'm rich as ****. I'll confess to her how broke I am only after I ****ed her.


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## Zombocalypse (Jun 13, 2017)

TrickWilliams said:


> Maybe he manned up. Asked her out yesterday evening and they have been in Bonerville ever since.
> 
> Hasn't had time to check his thread.



I haven't made the time to check this thread because most of the responses were a joke. I'm glad and thankful for the people who gave serious responses.


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## Gibsonator (Jun 13, 2017)

you waited too long I already fukked her 12 ways to Sunday bro, sorry not sorry


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## silvereyes87 (Jun 13, 2017)

Did you piitb yet?


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## Jamz (Jun 14, 2017)

Vulgarities in this thread aside, just straight up asking is probably your best bet. Then again, chances are she's heard it a million times before because men are like that, so *shrugs* Personally I'm not really up for putting people in that awkward 'Uhm nah sorry' situation while they're at work but hey, each to their own.


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## Zombocalypse (Jun 16, 2017)

Anyway...

Tomorrow is the day that I'll visit the store. Wish me luck!


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## TrickWilliams (Jun 16, 2017)

Any takers on which way this goes?

Doesn't even talk to her?

Talks to her, doesn't ask her out?

Fukks her on her cash register?


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## knightmare999 (Jun 16, 2017)

TrickWilliams said:


> Any takers on which way this goes?
> 
> Doesn't even talk to her?
> 
> ...



He's definitely going to talk to her. 

"Excuse me, miss.  I have a broke arm.  I was wondering if you could help me load this couch into my van."


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## Zombocalypse (Jun 16, 2017)

FYI, everyone, I'm gonna talk to her. But for tomorrow, I'll play it safe. I'm not gonna rush this thing. This first day, I'll talk about safe topics. I'm just gonna ask her how she's doing, and then tell her how I'm doing. Safe stuff... I'll do the heavy flirting on the first date. lol


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## silvereyes87 (Jun 17, 2017)

Zombocalypse said:


> FYI, everyone, I'm gonna talk to her. But for tomorrow, I'll play it safe. I'm not gonna rush this thing. This first day, I'll talk about safe topics. I'm just gonna ask her how she's doing, and then tell her how I'm doing. Safe stuff... I'll do the heavy flirting on the first date. lol



Safe stuff. What's you're favorite animal? 
Chocolate or vanilla ice cream?
can I put it in the butt? 
Dude quit being a vag and do it or don't. 
Never heard of someone making such a big build up of something so mediocre.


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## JOMO (Jun 17, 2017)

Well have you spoken to her while in the store? Joked around with her at all? I wouldn't plan this all out, just frequent the joint,  get semi familiar with her and just ask when you see the time is right. If you haven't had a conversation with her I wouldn't ask her out right out of the gate. 

All he wanted was some mushu-Jackie Chan (rush hour 2)


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## BigSwolePump (Jun 17, 2017)

Enough of this:


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## Gibsonator (Jun 17, 2017)

seriously, these starved for attention kids these days. man the fukk up or shut the fukk up you lil wiener ugh


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## Itburnstopee (Jun 20, 2017)

Fool proof way to pull Asian puss, is do this:

walk up to her and say "SUM TING WONG? RICKY RICKY SUCKY SUCKY FIGH DORRAH"


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## Itburnstopee (Jun 20, 2017)

No but seriously it doesn't matter just say anything and stop trying to control and plan shit out, it'll happen if it's gonna happen. She'll decide whether she's gonna **** you right when she sees you and if she says "mi no likey" then there's literally tons of other girls


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## Bro Bundy (Jun 20, 2017)

did u violate her anally?


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## JAXNY (Jun 27, 2017)

Summer said:


> I'm a girl, I'm sure she would just appreciate you honestly asking her out for a meal or something. We generally don't like pickup lines.. and don't try and act smooth or like you got lots of game, she will think your a ****boy and we generally try to avoid them.



Here ya go take her to dinner, American or Chinese?
On the American menu the special for tonight is the famous 9inch American tube steak, or 
Chinese we got the one eyed trouser trout served with a cup of cream of sum yung guy. 
Be a gentleman, which do you prefer honey, American or Chinese.


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## JAXNY (Jun 27, 2017)

Zombocalypse said:


> FYI, everyone, I'm gonna talk to her. But for tomorrow, I'll play it safe. I'm not gonna rush this thing. This first day, I'll talk about safe topics. I'm just gonna ask her how she's doing, and then tell her how I'm doing. Safe stuff... I'll do the heavy flirting on the first date. lol



I had a buddy once kind of like you and took this same route. You know how it ended. It ended with the girl being a little pissed off and him winding up on the friend list. 
She told him he was a nice guy but to slow for her. 
Move to slow and when you do eventually get it, you'll be slopping up someone else's sloppy seconds.


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## BigSwolePump (Jun 28, 2017)

This footage was just released from his encounter. No one ever heard from him again.


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## Gibsonator (Jun 28, 2017)

BigSwolePump said:


> This footage was just released from his encounter. No one ever heard from him again.



daaamn door opened and she threw his ass back down lmfao and even ran after him! worst rapist ever hahahahaha. and yep, that explains why we haven't heard from him, maybe that's what happened to geo as well???


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## Beezy (Jun 28, 2017)

BigSwolePump said:


> This footage was just released from his encounter. No one ever heard from him again.



Hahahahaha! 
I love that she gave chase at the end! Like she'd been raped in an elevator a few times before and finally had a chance to get even.


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## BigSwolePump (Jul 5, 2017)

I have to admit. I was hoping for an update. Maybe he wasn't able to post bond lol


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## knightmare999 (Jul 5, 2017)

BigSwolePump said:


> I have to admit. I was hoping for an update. Maybe he wasn't able to post bond lol


I was thinking about zombo last night!
Thought I was the only one!


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## OmegaPharma (Jul 5, 2017)

Agreed. She made up her mind already you just have to ask. Answer will be the same whether you wait or not


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## OmegaPharma (Jul 5, 2017)

Works 50% of the time, everytime


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## Gwynn (Jul 6, 2017)

Yikes, I've worked in retail and had customers ask me out. It really threw me off and embarrassed me, considering it was at my workplace & around customers/co-workers. I instantly rejected them...


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## trim (Jul 10, 2017)

Tell her you have a really nice box in your basement you want to lock her up in.  Girls love box play


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## tunafisherman (Jul 10, 2017)

Sounds like he's attempting to be placed in the friend zone.  it don't ****ing matter what you talk about, if she's DTF she'll ****.  Quit acting like a child, this is some grade school shit you're pulling.  Be a man, women like men---and then some women like women too.  Find one of those and you'll be just fine.

BTW for the regulars here, I have an 18 and 19 year old chick lined up to visit me and my wife before the end of the month...here I thought my days of ****ing teens was done.


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## Muffy (Jul 12, 2017)

trim said:


> Tell her you have a really nice box in your basement you want to lock her up in.  Girls love box play



======= this


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## Seeker (Jul 13, 2017)

Ok, the dufus is long gone and doesn't appear to be coming back.  Thread is history.


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## Beezy (Jul 13, 2017)

Lmao! It is funny how my first week in here I though, "Wow, these vets are cynical af!" 
It's all starting to make sense.


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## Milo (Jul 13, 2017)

So ****ing cringy. What happened to men grabbin em by the pussy?


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## Milo (Jul 13, 2017)

Muffy said:


> ======= this


I have a really nice box in my basement I want to lock you up in.


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## Bro Bundy (Jul 13, 2017)

Any chance u can lock me in there with her??


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## Milo (Jul 13, 2017)

Bro Bundy said:


> Any chance u can lock me in there with her??


Sorry man. I have a special box for Muffy. But you can have your own box.


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## Muffy (Jul 13, 2017)

Milo said:


> Sorry man. I have a special box for Muffy. But you can have your own box.



Awww...thats the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me...my own special box in a basement with a lock....milo u sexy devil!....u shudnt have...(bats eyelashes)


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## Milo (Jul 13, 2017)

Muffy said:


> Awww...thats the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me...my own special box in a basement with a lock....milo u sexy devil!....u shudnt have...(bats eyelashes)


Only the strongest locks and the best of boxes for you Muff.


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## trim (Jul 13, 2017)

Told ya women love box play!


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## BigSwolePump (Jul 13, 2017)

Muffy said:


> ======= this





Milo said:


> I have a really nice box in my basement I want to lock you up in.





Muffy said:


> Awww...thats the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me...my own special box in a basement with a lock....milo u sexy devil!....u shudnt have...(bats eyelashes)





Milo said:


> Only the strongest locks and the best of boxes for you Muff.


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## Muffy (Jul 14, 2017)

BigSwolePump said:


>



====Bam bam!


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