# Would you date a girl who....



## Joliver (Oct 4, 2022)

So I started seeing this girl casually a week or so ago. So she comes over for dinner tonight and I'm grilling some tomahawks and potatoes...thinking I'm going to get lucky. Obviously I'm typing this, so I didn't. Boo. 

But over dinner, we started talking about tinfoil hat stuff...because I can't help myself. My paranoia ranges from mild to wild, but nothing... absolutely NOTHING...could compare to this. 

This girl said, on the way to my house, that a bigfoot--as in sasquatch--ran out in front of her car necessitating and emergency braking procedure. I thought it was a joke. But then she became upset. She really thinks she saw a bigfoot. The mockery began rather benignly. But it proceeded to me putting on my gag hairy house shoes and stomping around with a bag of jack link's jerky in my hand. 

Needless to say...I'm at home alone. I've had time to re-think my ill-mannered assault on her lived experience. I've considered all important factors: 1) she has boobs, 2) nice butt, 3) is a biological woman, 4) has seen a bigfoot.

Now...with all of that considered, I'll put it to a vote. 

What should ole jol do?


----------



## Send0 (Oct 4, 2022)

Did you ask if sasquatches arouse her? You might be able to salvage this by agreeing to some role play.

Be sure to tell her bigfoots actually have tiny PP's. If she insists otherwise then tell her not all stereotypes are true, and you're offended by her speciesism.


----------



## Joliver (Oct 4, 2022)

Send0 said:


> Did you ask if sasquatches arouse her? You might be able to salvage this by agreeing to some role play.



I was doing Michael Jackson's thriller dance with my furry house shoes on when she stormed out. Everything happened so fast.🤷‍♂️


----------



## Send0 (Oct 4, 2022)

Joliver said:


> I was doing Michael Jackson's thriller dance with my furry house shoes on when she stormed out. Everything happened so fast.🤷‍♂️


Your problem was that you ONLY put on the furry shoes; how do you expect her to not be offended?

If you had put on a full costume then she would have known you were taking her seriously.

Go watch Harry and the Henderson's for research purposes, and try again buddy.


----------



## Bro Bundy (Oct 4, 2022)

damn it joli make fun of her after u get laid ...newb


----------



## Bro Bundy (Oct 4, 2022)

roll tide!


----------



## Bro Bundy (Oct 4, 2022)

b


----------



## Send0 (Oct 4, 2022)




----------



## Bro Bundy (Oct 4, 2022)

u


----------



## Bro Bundy (Oct 4, 2022)

n


----------



## Bro Bundy (Oct 4, 2022)

d


----------



## Bro Bundy (Oct 4, 2022)

fuckin sendo


----------



## Bro Bundy (Oct 4, 2022)

y


----------



## Joliver (Oct 4, 2022)

Send0 said:


> View attachment 29404



This is the SECOND time tonight that picture has been on my phone.


----------



## Joliver (Oct 4, 2022)

Bro Bundy said:


> damn it joli make fun of her after u get laid ...newb



Complete rookie mistake. 😔


----------



## Trendkill (Oct 4, 2022)

Joliver said:


> I was doing Michael Jackson's thriller dance with my furry house shoes on when she stormed out. Everything happened so fast.🤷‍♂️


Sounds like you Wanna Be Starting Something and she Beat It. I feel Bad but some times you have to look at the Man In The Mirror and ask yourself what would Billy Jean do?

nice boobs and a great ass can overcome many things. This isn’t one of those things.


----------



## lifter6973 (Oct 4, 2022)

Date, no. Fuck, yes.
I don't care what any woman believes, always an extremely high chance I would fuck them.


----------



## Human_Backhoe (Oct 4, 2022)

lifter6973 said:


> Date, no. Fuck, yes.
> I don't care what any woman believes, always an extremely high chance I would fuck them.








???????


----------



## Iron1 (Oct 4, 2022)

Bigfoot stole your girl, Jol.


----------



## IronSoul (Oct 4, 2022)

Joliver said:


> So I started seeing this girl casually a week or so ago. So she comes over for dinner tonight and I'm grilling some tomahawks and potatoes...thinking I'm going to get lucky. Obviously I'm typing this, so I didn't. Boo.
> 
> But over dinner, we started talking about tinfoil hat stuff...because I can't help myself. My paranoia ranges from mild to wild, but nothing... absolutely NOTHING...could compare to this.
> 
> ...



Lmao you crack me the fuck up dude 


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk


----------



## Butch_C (Oct 4, 2022)




----------



## lifter6973 (Oct 4, 2022)

Human_Backhoe said:


> View attachment 29415
> 
> 
> 
> ???????


The odds are not with this one.


----------



## Yano (Oct 4, 2022)

Time out for Bigfoot. 

So back in the mid 80's I was staying at a camp on Sebec Lake here in  Maine, no running water , we filled up jugs or buckets at a spring a few hundred yards away instead of using lake water. 

As I'm walking to get water this thing busts out of the  brush on one side of the trail and boogies down it a  bit and veers off to the other side and poof it was gone. 

OK Maine , bear cub , coyote , stray dog who knows right ? 

Well ...  I never got a look at its face and it was dark brown like a bear not really black or super dark what still stands out in my mind and always has was the way it ran. 

It used its front legs to pull itself it seemed to me , when it came onto the trail and when it left , like it pulled itself  to where it wanted to go. 

On top of that it didn't run like a 4 leg animal it ran for lack of any better example like a chimp or a monkey , it took a few  big steps like on all four's but then it went up on just its back legs for a few steps and yeah looked like it grabbed the ground and used its front legs like arms to quickly change direction and get off the trail. 

Like the size of a big dog St Bernard type shit ya know  , but there's no way it was a dog or any bear cub not running like that. 

I'm not saying it was a young Bigfoot , it could of been some deformed or fucked up bear I suppose i'm not one to just jump to a paranormal conclusion. Some times life is stranger than fiction but I sure have never been able to figure out what the fuck it was from that day til now. An Ive hunted these woods off and on since I was 12.


----------



## snake (Oct 4, 2022)

This one is simple; not normal but simple. She has a cryptozoology fetish. She was hoping the night was going to end with you in a monkey suit, waving your arms above your head and pounding your chest while you pounded her ass.

You fuuked up dude. No Yeti for your Freddie. Probably for the better, the Lock Ness Monster theme would have been a letdown white boy. Best to move on.


----------



## 1bigun11 (Oct 4, 2022)

When I was in the Marines I fucked a big foot on a dare.  The pussy wasn't bad, but the damn thing got attached to me and started following me around everywhere I went.  I taught her to play fetch and stuff, and she used to love it when I tricked her and fake threw the ball.  But eventually she grew tired of me.  The last I saw she was slapping her face into the water, laughing her ass off, and pulling fresh fish out of the water with some guy named Yano.  I hope they're happy.  They broke my heart.....


----------



## Thebiggestdumbass (Oct 4, 2022)

1bigun11 said:


> When I was in the Marines I fucked a big foot on a dare.  The pussy wasn't bad, but the damn thing got attached to me and started following me around everywhere I went.  I taught her to play fetch and stuff, and she used to love it when I tricked her and fake threw the ball.  But eventually she grew tired of me.  The last I saw she was slapping her face into the water, laughing her ass off, and pulling fresh fish out of the water with some guy named Yano.  I hope they're happy.  They broke my heart.....


Sounds like you were fucking a dog not Bigfoot


----------



## 1bigun11 (Oct 4, 2022)

Thebiggestdumbass said:


> Sounds like you were fucking a dog not Bigfoot


Sir, I have fucked plenty of dogs.  And this was no dog. Her name was Sharon, and she loved me for a time....


----------



## Fearthereaper (Oct 4, 2022)

Bro Bundy said:


> damn it joli make fun of her after u get laid ...newb


Literally this. These are the kind of people you ghost unless the sex is actually that good. But even then her fantasy probably isn't going to be worth it man!


----------



## Joliver (Oct 4, 2022)

ATTENTION: 

There seems to be some mistake whereby people would rather me shoot myself in the leg with a 38 than to help me solve this problem. 

I know you all love me and this is simply a mistake so I've allowed people to change their votes just in case. 

Thank you for your time.


----------



## Send0 (Oct 4, 2022)

Joliver said:


> ATTENTION:
> 
> There seems to be some mistake whereby people would rather me shoot myself in the leg with a 38 than to help me solve this problem.
> 
> ...


But the real question is, can we vote twice?


----------



## Joliver (Oct 4, 2022)

Send0 said:


> But the real question is, can we vote twice?



I'm sorry, there must be some mistake here. I've allowed for re-voting so that you could not vote for me to shoot myself in the leg. This is NOT an anonymous poll. 

And for anyone wondering...you can't vote twice for me to shoot myself. You sick bastards.


----------



## shackleford (Oct 4, 2022)

Send0 said:


> But the real question is, can we vote twice?


I don't see why not. The guy has two legs.


----------



## Joliver (Oct 4, 2022)

shackleford said:


> I don't see why not. The guy has two legs.



I'll see you burn for this, Shackleford. 😡


----------



## CJ (Oct 5, 2022)

shackleford said:


> I don't see why not. The guy has two legs.


Great point!!!

I can edit it to Shoot Both Legs. 🤔


----------



## MisterSuperGod (Oct 5, 2022)

Shoot yourself in the leg is clearly the winner.

It'll only hurt for a few minutes. It's like ripping off a bandaid. It's more mental than anything else.

You'll have a sweet scar afterwards too, and we all know chicks dig scars.


----------



## Jet Labs (Oct 5, 2022)

Send0 said:


> View attachment 29404



Smells like Bigfoot's dick up in this bitch lol


----------



## Gibsonator (Oct 5, 2022)

Seems like a red flag and you made the right decision but depending on how she looked I may have given her the benefit just to smash?


----------



## Joliver (Oct 5, 2022)

Well, the internet has spoken.  Who am I to question the designs of the grand architect....

Proof: 





Hope y'all are happy. 😐


----------



## Joliver (Oct 5, 2022)

Taking the trash log in new direction. Internet dating. Big things coming soon.


----------



## MisterSuperGod (Oct 5, 2022)

Joliver said:


> Well, the internet has spoken.  Who am I to question the designs of the grand architect....
> 
> Proof:
> 
> ...



i've heard of skipping leg day, but it looks like you've been skipping gym day, bro, and you said leg, not calf or ankle. i feel cheated here.


----------



## Joliver (Oct 5, 2022)

MisterSuperGod said:


> i've heard of skipping leg day, but it looks like you've been skipping gym day, bro, and you said leg, not calf or ankle. i feel cheated here.



WRONG!!! 

I SAID "LEG." NOT THIGH! GOOD DAY, SIR. 

I SAID GOOD DAY!!!!!!


----------



## Butch_C (Oct 5, 2022)

Joliver said:


> Well, the internet has spoken.  Who am I to question the designs of the grand architect....
> 
> Proof:
> 
> ...


But why to you have a camel toe?


----------



## Joliver (Oct 5, 2022)

Butch_C said:


> But why to you have a camel toe?



Because I'm a 13 year old teenaged female Chinese spy. I've never denied this.

Thanks for noticing....pedo. FBI alerted.


----------



## Butch_C (Oct 5, 2022)

Joliver said:


> Because I'm a 13 year old teenaged female spy. I've never denied this.
> 
> Thanks for noticing....pedo. FBI alerted.


Oh I just thought you liked the feeling of splaying your nutsack by hiking your pants up. I like your explanation better though.


----------



## Thebiggestdumbass (Oct 5, 2022)

Joliver said:


> Taking the trash log in new direction. Internet dating. Big things coming soon.


That’ll be way better than @nissan11  “accidentally shot this girl in the leg I meant to shoot mine”


----------



## FlyingPapaya (Oct 5, 2022)

Joliver said:


> Because I'm a 13 year old teenaged female Chinese spy. I've never denied this.
> 
> Thanks for noticing....pedo. FBI alerted.


Funny that might


----------



## Joliver (Oct 5, 2022)

Thebiggestdumbass said:


> That’ll be way better than @nissan11  “accidentally shot this girl in the leg I meant to shoot mine”



Hello. A/S/L? Feet pix pls. Thx.


----------



## Jonjon (Oct 5, 2022)

Believing in big foot? No big deal
Being comfortable enough to admit it to a stranger on a first date says a lot about her maturity


----------



## Janoy Cresva (Oct 6, 2022)

I think so. I'd suggest we go bigfoot hunting and camp out. Sounds like fun


----------



## old-man (Oct 24, 2022)

Crazy women need sex to - fuck her till You can't walk. Simple.


----------



## BRICKS (Oct 24, 2022)

Got some news for ya buddy.  This is one lesson dudes just don't learn.  At least I haven't.  Been married to Mrs. BRICKS for 20 years and I can not count how many times I've planned on getting busy only to say something sometime prior that to completely fk that up.  Then spend the rest of the day telling myself to STFU next time.  It's a repeated cycle, and I'll bet everyone posting has committed this error, more than once.  FWIW, not a total loss.  Excellent thread m.  Very entertaining.


----------



## Kraken (Oct 24, 2022)

Yano said:


> Time out for Bigfoot.
> 
> So back in the mid 80's I was staying at a camp on Sebec Lake here in  Maine, no running water , we filled up jugs or buckets at a spring a few hundred yards away instead of using lake water.
> 
> ...


Clearly this was a Man-Bear-Pig. 

As for @Joliver I would have fucked her, maybe not dated her, at least for too long. Although I did date a girl who believes the world is flat. We dated a few years actually, and this was never really a problem. Because we never discussed it. Other than this odd belief she was pretty normal. Well, for a woman.


----------



## BigChief1 (Oct 25, 2022)

I believe you made the right call. She sounds like a possible stage 5 clinger


----------



## maryempenn (Oct 25, 2022)

old-man said:


> Crazy women need sex to - fuck her till You can't walk. Simple.


Not all but truth


----------



## Big-paul (Oct 27, 2022)

Joliver said:


> This girl said, on the way to my house, that a bigfoot--as in sasquatch--ran out in front of her car


At this point the conversation  is over but she still knows  where you live.


----------



## Sven Northman (Oct 27, 2022)

You missed a golden opportunity.

Crazy in the head, wild in bed. 

She might have let you in the backdoor.


----------



## Sven Northman (Oct 27, 2022)

Big-paul said:


> At this point the conversation  is over but she still knows  where you live.


She might peek in his windows late at night in a Bigfoot costume.


----------



## Signsin1 (Oct 27, 2022)

Jol, Sasquatches are real. VERY REAL

I shot one with my Desert Eagle back in '97.. Caught him breaking into the little barn out back getting into an old pile of penthouses I had stashed. Blew his head slap off

I got his feet hanging above the mantle right now. Always a hot topic when family come over for Christmas

All you hunters out there can brag all you want about your 12 point Deer mounts..Doesnt compare to my Bigfoot feet hanging above the mantle.

Id take a picture to show you guys but  my camera phone isnt working.

P.S. Give her another shot..


----------



## Joliver (Oct 27, 2022)

Signsin1 said:


> Jol, Sasquatches are real. VERY REAL
> 
> I shot one with my Desert Eagle back in '97.. Caught him breaking into the little barn out back getting into an old pile of penthouses I had stashed. Blew his head slap off
> 
> ...



Reminds me of the time when I AR-15'ed down that UFO and tried to send a pic of it. NSA broke my door down and [redacted].


----------



## MisterSuperGod (Oct 28, 2022)

On a serious note, claiming to have seen BF doesn't make her a nut. She saw something mundane and really believes it's BF.

Plenty of people believe in hogwash. Ghosts, demons, psychics. Doesn't necessarily make them crazy. Unscientific maybe, but not crazy.

Millions of people treat a book about the son of god as a bible of sorts. Now some of them mother fuckers are nuts, but they're the minority.


----------



## Yano (Oct 28, 2022)

MisterSuperGod said:


> On a serious note, claiming to have seen BF doesn't make her a nut. She saw something mundane and really believes it's BF.
> 
> Plenty of people believe in hogwash. Ghosts, demons, psychics. Doesn't necessarily make them crazy. Unscientific maybe, but not crazy.
> 
> Millions of people treat a book about the son of god as a bible of sorts. Now some of them mother fuckers are nuts, but they're the minority.


I related my possible bigfoot sighting in another thread , that was no bullshit. 

An I'll tell ya another monster story , The Screaming Jesus , was a legend around here this screeching monster that showed up in the fall in the woods and it was terrifying. The old timers talked about it and all , folks claimed to have seen glimpses of this or that. 

We heard it a few times and it scared the living fuck out of us as kids. Years later I heard that same exact screeching , chilled me to the bone and thats when I found out what one of my child hood monsters  really was. Imagine being a kid and hearing this coming  through the swamps outside your window.


----------



## Joliver (Oct 28, 2022)

MisterSuperGod said:


> On a serious note, claiming to have seen BF doesn't make her a nut. She saw something mundane and really believes it's BF.
> 
> Plenty of people believe in hogwash. Ghosts, demons, psychics. Doesn't necessarily make them crazy. Unscientific maybe, but not crazy.
> 
> Millions of people treat a book about the son of god as a bible of sorts. Now some of them mother fuckers are nuts, but they're the minority.



Yeah...forgot to mention that we are currently dating. 

It was the hairy feet thing. You'll have to ask someone in the chat that day. I've got a strange beaver fetish. 

I apologize on advance for what you may hear.


----------



## Yano (Oct 28, 2022)

Joliver said:


> Yeah...forgot to mention that we are currently dating.
> 
> It was the hairy feet thing. You'll have to ask someone in the chat that day. I've got a strange beaver fetish.
> 
> I apologize on advance for what you may hear.


reminds me of a Doors song .... how did that go  ....

 I wanna Tell ya about Alabama Radio and the Big Beat .... comes out of the Chilton County swamps with a hairy back n big  feet ...


----------



## Signsin1 (Oct 28, 2022)

Joliver said:


> Reminds me of the time when I AR-15'ed down that UFO and tried to send a pic of it. NSA broke my door down and [redacted].


We are walking a tight line talking about it on here. NSA, CIA, Big brother is watching guys like us...

Hell, the CIA came took the headless squatch and made me swear, " You will never tell anybody about this"..  Im going out on a limb here to tell you guys.  ( i hid the feet from them)

What Im saying is.. Shes probably crazy as hell, but give her another shot


----------



## Joliver (Oct 28, 2022)

Signsin1 said:


> We are walking a tight line talking about it on here. NSA, CIA, Big brother is watching guys like us...
> 
> Hell, the CIA came took the headless squatch and made me swear, " You will never tell anybody about this"..  Im going out on a limb here to tell you guys.  ( i hid the feet from them)
> 
> What Im saying is.. Shes probably crazy as hell, but give her another shot



I did. We went to lunch together and she had hairy toes....and all that implies. 

Don't judge me or I'll fucking report us all to the FBI. I swear to God.


----------



## Signsin1 (Oct 28, 2022)

Joliver said:


> I did. We went to lunch together and she had hairy toes....and all that implies.
> 
> Don't judge me or I'll fucking report us all to the FBI. I swear to God.


You do that and I swear to God our friendship is done! I got to much shit in my house for the FBI to see


----------



## Joliver (Oct 28, 2022)

Signsin1 said:


> You do that and I swear to God our friendship is done! I got to much shit in my house for the FBI to see



Well, then overlook my weird hairy beaver fetish and we'll just...move on. LIKE IT NEVER HAPPENED.


----------



## Signsin1 (Oct 28, 2022)

Joliver said:


> Well, then overlook my weird hairy beaver fetish and we'll just...move on. LIKE IT NEVER HAPPENED.


Touche...never happened..(looks the other way)


----------



## BigChief1 (Oct 28, 2022)

Weird bitches bring weird problems. Unless you enjoy the taste of gun metal I advise to stay away from such nutt jobs.

You want advice here it is…. Best sexual experience is a chubby bitch, with giant titts, fat ass, and somewhat of a cute face. They try harder! Will defer to Juicy on this as I believe he runs adds for 1on1 home consultations on the Jenny Craig website.

Not jobs are a no go for me!


----------



## Luju (Nov 7, 2022)

MisterSuperGod said:


> On a serious note, claiming to have seen BF doesn't make her a nut. She saw something mundane and really believes it's BF.
> 
> Plenty of people believe in hogwash. Ghosts, demons, psychics. Doesn't necessarily make them crazy. Unscientific maybe, but not crazy.
> 
> Millions of people treat a book about the son of god as a bible of sorts. Now some of them mother fuckers are nuts, but they're the minority.



Well I have seen demons and "ghosts" true life.

I have even spoken to God.."as a man speaks to his friend" 

Not believing in the supernatural does not make it unreal.

I have forseen the future in precise details and been forced to live through it afterwards unable to even change one variable to bring about a different ending.

And yes I am a woman... Lol

Maybe I am just crazy right?


----------



## MisterSuperGod (Nov 7, 2022)

Luju said:


> Well I have seen demons and "ghosts" true life.
> 
> I have even spoken to God.."as a man speaks to his friend"
> 
> ...



No maybe about it. i believe in science, not mumbo jumbo. If science ever proves the mumbo jumbo to be legit then i will reevaluate my current stance.


----------



## CJ (Nov 7, 2022)

Luju said:


> Well I have seen demons and "ghosts" true life.
> 
> I have even spoken to God.."as a man speaks to his friend"
> 
> ...


Ummmm, did you happen to catch tonight's Powerball numbers in one of your visions? 🤞🤞


----------



## Luju (Nov 7, 2022)

Lols!

No powerball sorry!

I tried and failed myself.. Seems like "organic growth" is the best of all 

Whether character, money or muscle💪🤑😁

Otherwise you are skinny fat, miser rich or a leader without character thinking honesty and truth is the basis of how this current world operates 😉

Its about enjoying the journey more than the getting the rewards!


----------



## Luju (Nov 7, 2022)

Without hijacking this thread 

Most of science is based on "reasonable guesstimations" unless it is something that can be duplicated precisely time and again.

Whatever rocks your boat! 

I have personally experienced things science can't explain and I am okay with it. 

Yet I have never seen a Yeti or Big foot😏


----------



## ccpro (Nov 7, 2022)

She sounds crazy in the sac....you need to salvage that by saying you've been doing research and you believe her....


----------



## Walter_first (Jan 2, 2023)

Send0 said:


> View attachment 29404


Hm...


----------



## anewguy (Jan 7, 2023)

All of them are crazy. Believing she saw bigfoot is like a 2/10 on women's sanity levels.


----------

