# Becoming Less Awful



## TODAY (Jun 26, 2019)

I was once an almost-decent powerlifter who achieved the following at around 195 lbs:

490 squat
310 bench
606 deadlift

But then I had a kid, tore my left hamstring to shreds and started working 60 hour weeks. The result? 230 pounds of watery, directionless ennui.

Now, though, things have stabilized in all meaningful areas and I have elected to try my hand at not being a slovenly piece of garbage anymore.

THE GOAL:

I'd like to think that I'm still capable of putting up a 1400lb-ish total at my desired bodyweight of 190. That being said, the goal has less to do with getting back on the platform and more to do with getting off of my ass.

THE PLAN:

Gonna start with linear periodization with a focus on increasing weekly tonnage. This will almost certainly shift to undulating periodization in the future.

Gonna stick to my cruise dose of 200mg Test E/wk alongside 350mg/wk of boldenone cypionate and 50mg/day of proviron. Might add in DHB somewhere down the line.

Gonna eat at maintenance+ 200 for at least 6 weeks and then reassess.

VARIABLES/WEIRDNESSES:

My left elbow is made out of glass. I've been focusing on weighted dips as my primary upper body push movement recently, and while the numbers have been going up I am fairly certain the my flat bench is gonna be absolute dogshit for the foreseeable future.

Also, my hamstring injury never quite healed properly. As such, I've still got a fair amount of hip shift at the bottom of my squat. The plan here is to continue focusing on mobility and form work instead of pursuing outright numbers until I've mitigated the hip shift.

Lastly, my digestive system can no longer tolerate dairy or red meat. As a result, you can look forward to some wild culinary mishaps as I try to shove huge amounts of fish and bird protein into my face on a daily basis.


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## rawdeal (Jun 26, 2019)

Sounds like a well thought out plan.  With all those elbows and hamstrings and GI Tracts it might be your best bodypart is your BALLS.

Proceed with caution, and .... Respect.


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## Flyingdragon (Jun 26, 2019)

Not shocking that Raw appreciates a nice set of BALLS.....




rawdeal said:


> Sounds like a well thought out plan.  With all those elbows and hamstrings and GI Tracts it might be your best bodypart is your BALLS.
> 
> Proceed with caution, and .... Respect.


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## TODAY (Jun 26, 2019)

rawdeal said:


> Sounds like a well thought out plan.  With all those elbows and hamstrings and GI Tracts it might be your best bodypart is your BALLS.
> 
> Proceed with caution, and .... Respect.


They're basically vestigial at this point but everybody likes a craisin every now and then


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## rawdeal (Jun 26, 2019)

Ignore him TODAY.  Met FD once elsewhere, and he's been like Herpes ever since, just keeps coming back.


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## TODAY (Jun 26, 2019)

rawdeal said:


> Ignore him TODAY.  Met FD once elsewhere, and he's been like Herpes ever since, just keeps coming back.


FD's been flirting with me since 2013. He's a persistent one.


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## Metalhead1 (Jun 26, 2019)

Best of luck eating all that fish and bird. I can never tolerate it too long. 

Any idea what the issue is with the elbow?

Also, interesting choice of compounds. Care to elaborate why you chose them?


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## The Tater (Jun 26, 2019)

Good luck to you. I'll be following along!


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## bigdog (Jun 26, 2019)

rawdeal said:


> Ignore him TODAY.  Met FD once elsewhere, and he's been like Herpes ever since, just keeps coming back.



Should we ignore him tomorrow as well?  LOL


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## Flyingdragon (Jun 26, 2019)

You guys are MEAN.....Raw meet me at Applebees for happy hour.....


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## Tiny (Jun 26, 2019)

I learned a new word - ennui

Doing weighted dips with elbow issues seems off. Weighted dips _give me_ elbow issues

So the way I interpret your outlined goal, it isn't meshing with the plan in place. To emphasize, this is my interpretation only.  The advice I'd give for whatever it's worth is this. You're older, kid/kids, work load, etc. 
Normal. 
Put previous #'s in a little box, and light them on fire. You're setting yourself up for another injury chasing them. Focus on shifting back to the "actively training" lifestyle and don't emphasize yesterday...Today...and welcome back


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## CJ (Jun 26, 2019)

Tiny said:


> I learned a new word - ennui



And vestigial. It's like a fukkin classroom up in here! :32 (14):


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## Flyingdragon (Jun 26, 2019)

There will be an oral exam later 



CJ275 said:


> And vestigial. It's like a fukkin classroom up in here! :32 (14):


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## TODAY (Jun 27, 2019)

UPDATE:

Yesterday was an off day.

I made a burrito.

It had beans and jerk chicken and broccoli.

It was delicious.

TODAY, I made my titties bigger. BEHOLD:

*Competition-style bench:
*
Worked up to 215x5x4

*Close grip, touch and go bench:

*185x6x5

*Facepulls:

*Somethingx12x4
*Tricep Pushdowns:

*A numberx12x4

Everything felt good today. Not an elbow issue in sight, though my upper back tightness was certainly not up to par on the last two sets of comp.-style bench. Definitely something that I need to address.


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## TODAY (Jun 27, 2019)

Metalhead1 said:


> Best of luck eating all that fish and bird. I can never tolerate it too long.
> 
> Any idea what the issue is with the elbow?
> 
> Also, interesting choice of compounds. Care to elaborate why you chose them?



I was once VERY gung-ho about running huge amounts of tren and test. Ultimately, though, I found those super aggressive blasts to be a bad value judgement _for me._

As far as the compounds themselves go, I tend to respond quite well to relatively low doses of test and run boldenone on top because it just makes me _feel good._ 19-nor drugs simply do not agree with me, nor do huge dosages of highly androgenic compounds. That being said, proviron has a profound effect on my mood and motivation, so I choose to run it conservatively despite the acne risk, etc.


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## TODAY (Jun 27, 2019)

Tiny said:


> I learned a new word - ennui
> 
> Doing weighted dips with elbow issues seems off. Weighted dips _give me_ elbow issues
> 
> ...


I think you're mostly correct here.

To clarify: my most immediate goal has very little to do with chasing numbers. Although I'd like to think that I COULD compete again some day, my primary motivation right now is just to enjoy lifting again. As such, this log is likely to shift significantly as I feel out where my body and mind truly stand in relation to my goals.

In any case, I genuinely appreciate the input.


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## gymrat827 (Jun 27, 2019)

you have any plans for gear or is this a natty deal..?


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## TODAY (Jun 27, 2019)

gymrat827 said:


> you have any plans for gear or is this a natty deal..?


Just deer antler velvet suppositories creatine-no-ester injections pre-workout.


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## TODAY (Jul 1, 2019)

BEHOLD:

*Conventional deadlift:
*Worked up to 405x5,5,4

*Snatch Grip DL:*
245x 8,8,10

*Weighted Chin-up:*
+45x6,6,6

*Farmer's Walks:
*Many.


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## TODAY (Jul 1, 2019)

Also, I cooked this on sunday:

Red snapper fillets  with herbs 'n' shit
Roasted radishes, squash, and leeks
Rice pilaf with tomatoes, onion and shiitake mushrooms.

This may or may not have been delicious. Boldenone makes me so hungry that a boiled chicken tit served on a rice cake would make my mouth water


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## Metalhead1 (Jul 1, 2019)

I may need to try boldenone if it increases appetite that much


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## TODAY (Jul 2, 2019)

Squat form work:

*Low Bar:*
Worked up to 315x6,6,6

*Paused High Bar:*
265x3,3,3,3,3

*Goblet Squat:*
80lb DBx12,12,12,12


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## TODAY (Jul 9, 2019)

Breast Work:
*

Competition-style bench:*
220x5x5

*Close Grip:*
185x7x4

*Dips:*
Bodyweightx12x4


Finished with facepulls, tricep pushdowns and hammer curls. Everything felt super smooth today.


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## TODAY (Jul 12, 2019)

Wheels:

*Low Bar Squat:*
315x7,7,6

*Paused High Bar:*
265x4,4,3,3,3

*Goblet Squat:*
85lb DBx 12,12,12

*Bad Girl Machine:*
Somethingx a lot


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## Metalhead1 (Jul 13, 2019)

TODAY said:


> Wheels:
> 
> *Low Bar Squat:*
> 315x7,7,6
> ...



Have you seen a good carryover from high bar paused squats in the past?


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## TODAY (Jul 13, 2019)

Metalhead1 said:


> Have you seen a good carryover from high bar paused squats in the past?


Absolutely. I use paused high bar for a few reasons:

1.) Building isometric strength in the thoracic spine

2.) Building confidence in the hole

3.) Practicing control

4.) Practicing tightness (especially in the lats and abductors)

5.) Adding more time under tension to lower body workouts


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## TODAY (Jul 18, 2019)

Tits

*Comp. Style Bench:
*220x6,6,5

*Close Grip:*
185x 8,8,7,6

*Dips:*
+25lbs x 8 x 4

Fecepulls, tricep pushdowns, hammer curls and a ****ton of pushups.


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## TODAY (Jul 22, 2019)

*Conventional Deadlift:*
405x5,5,5

*Snatch Grip:*
255x8,8,9

*Weighted Chin:*
+50x 6,6,7

Finished with an unpleasant number of farmer's walks and GHRs.


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## TODAY (Jul 22, 2019)

*Culinary Adventure:*

Cod fillets with soy, ****** and miso over brown rice, asparagus, shiitake mushroom and onion. Topped these bad boys with a yellow curry sauce.

Result:

Pretty okay.


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## TODAY (Jul 22, 2019)

TODAY said:


> *Culinary Adventure:*
> 
> Cod fillets with soy, ******* *and miso over brown rice, asparagus, shiitake mushroom and onion. Topped these bad boys with a yellow curry sauce.
> 
> ...


What in the Christ is this nonsense


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## Jin (Jul 22, 2019)

TODAY said:


> What in the Christ is this nonsense



POB is a G-inger. Once he got ownership it’s been a little fascist around here.


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## Flyingdragon (Jul 22, 2019)

TODAY said:


> *Culinary Adventure:*
> 
> Cod fillets with soy, ****** and miso over brown rice, asparagus, shiitake mushroom and onion. Topped these bad* lady boys* with a yellow curry sauce.
> 
> ...




Guess u didnt eat alone.....


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